We all commercials. You know, the things that get longer and longer each year, causing our favorite shows to shorter and shorter each year, and the things that absolutely nobody loves and have absolutely nothing to do with the stuff they are selling. Yeah! Those things! Well, it turns out they do something after all. They edecuate us!
Here a ten things I have learned from commercials:
10. Animals love to drink pop and beer, and even enjoy a nice drag every once in a while.
9. Name brand cleaners can wipe up anything and everything without the slightest bit of work.
8. Your girlfriend will love it if you buy her the Valentine’s Day gift set off an infomercial, instead of something that is meaningful.
7. Big Macs are perfectly designed hamburgers that are made with care with juicy meat placed in between two perfectly-shaped buns, and not two paper-thin slices of meat shoved into smashed buns and shoved into your bag.
6. Ford trucks can dodge renegade boulders.
5. Every movie is the #1 movie.
4. Cell phones can do everything!
3. Every candidate is better than the other.
2. Just merely a light spraying of Axe body spray can get you laid.
1. Shampoo can give women orgasms.
There you have it! That’s my list. If you have any more suggestions, feel free to comment.
Comments
Josh
Cell phones CAN do everything;
Axe spray does get you laid, if you look in the right places;
Shampoo can give women orgasms - don’t you know they’re always thinking about sex anyways?!?! LOL
I can think of one more to add: Mailing a laptop, it’ll be the only thing the post office doesn’t break during shipment!
Fat, shlubby guys are always married to hot women.
It is impossible to enjoy your life unless you own a car. THIS car.
Molson Canadian and Labatt Blue taste good.
As a McDonald’s worker, I’m offended by 7. We do not “shove” them in your bag. The rest is true though.
I’m sorry CW05, it’s just the ones around here do. Literally, I’ve seen them do it hundreds of times.